The holidays can bring some predictable stressors into our lives. Here are are some suggestions to help you keep the Holiday Blues away.
– Detach with Love; Pay attention to what has Heart and Meaning
– Lower Expectations – have a “good enough” Holiday
o E.G. Charlie Brown’s Christmas Tree
– Recognize the Good, the Warm, the Nice Moments
– Shorten or Extend the definition of the “Holiday Season” based on your needs:
o The Holiday “Season” can be a “Holi-Day” or two
o Cards and gifts can be sent past December 25 if relabeled as “Holiday” cards/Gifts
– Treasure and Honor your Memories
o Soak in their Sweetness, Honor your Losses, but
o Don’t get stuck in a morass of sentimentality
o Ask for help from a friend, religious leader, counselor if you are feeling stuck
– Everything changes: “This, too, (loneliness, sadness, happiness, elation) Shall Pass”
o Use today’s situation to envision what you want to be different going forward, then
o Act on how are you going to get there
– Expect, Accept and Tolerate Feelings that may be uncomfortable
o Practice Loving Kindness, Compassion and Mercy for your condition and others
o Emotions will pass and you can handle it (Serenity Prayer; Breathing mantra)
o Allowing emotions to just be may lead to something better and will avoid suffering
– Everyone is just trying to get their needs met; including you
o Hey, we’re all imperfect Human beings living in an imperfect world, trying to do our best;
o If you need to say “sorry” – do it, we all make mistakes, that is why the word exists.
o If you forgive someone, it will probably make you feel as good as or better than the other person for having done it.
– You don’t have to be happy during the holidays
o If you are experiencing grief over a recent loss this Holiday may not be a “happy” occasion, but it can be sacred, meaningful, even joyous. You can be alive, though in pain.
Do One Thing Different
– Lonely? – Reach Out, just a little; Do something for someone else; Call an old friend; Give a card to your neighbor; Create your own Holiday ritual; Be your own best friend; Join a group;
– Tired? – Slow Down – Breathe; notice what is happening now; Treat yourself to something special; Accept your limitations, say: “I am moving at a pace that is just right for me”
– Angry? – Soften your belly; Talk it Out; Look for little pieces of what’s good
– Hurt? – Soften your Heart; Try not to take it personally – what ever happened was more about them than it is about you.
Wishing you many Joyful Holiday Moments!